My step-father has had another heart attack. This one is severe. He’s not expected to regain consciousness.

I’m not sure what happens next. Thanks to discussion initiated by Michael, the funeral wishes are clear. But what this means for my mother… I don’t know. She lives in CA, I’m in NY.

We’ll just have to figure it out.

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  1. sabrinamari

    What do you need? Shall I call you? Hugging you tight!

    1. wgseligman

      What I find myself wishing for is someone to tell me what to do: How long should I stay out there, how much should I involve myself in any funerary details (“Before you spend $4000 on an urn, let me call Michael”), should I make any effort to keep airlines/hotels from ripping off a last-minute traveler, etc.

      Part of the reason why my mother would like to have me out there is so I can tell _her_ what to do!

      Like everyone else in times like these, I’ll just have to play it by ear and hope for the best.

      Thanks for the offer of help. You can call me if you’d like — I always take pleasure from that — but emotionally I think I’m grounded. My step-father’s health had been failing for years, so this turn of events is not unexpected. It’s the practical details that can get me flustered.

  2. wgseligman

    Thanks for the advice. It turns out that a 6’4″ 300-lb man does _not_ fly on any airline he wants to; it’s pretty much limited to Jet Blue, which does not offer bereavement fares.

    Anyway, it turns out that the air fare is not the big expense (thought it is a bite!) but the hotel room in LA. It’s the height of the tourist season. I know where I’ll go (the Comfort Inn in Santa Monica), but the longer I stay the bigger the expense.

    It’s a balancing act. I don’t know when support gives way to prudence.

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